Family is a single most important unit of any society. This explains why God created the first family after he had established the earth. There are many advantages inherent in the extended family system. The nuclear family does not exist in isolation; it comes from a larger system which is the extended family.
The extended family consists of the husband, wife, children and relatives of the husband on one part and wife on the other part. The relatives are the uncles, cousins, nephews, nieces, grand-parents among other members. It is a system which ensures that communal helps are rendered to the other members of the extended family as an obligation. The helps range from adopting children from other families and bringing them up, sending them to school, training them and providing for them.
Members of extended families help with labour when any family member of the families that makes up the lineage is doing work such as building a house. In those days there used to be voluntary services. People were known to be happy helping one another.
One cannot underrate the benefits of recognizing extended families. The system promotes peace and unity among the family members. Everybody is his brother’s keeper. The concerted efforts of all members of the different families made up of kindred or lineage usually bring people together and the result is that every nuclear family is protected and there is no doubt that security around individuals is guaranteed.
People should not neglect extended families after forming their own families by reason of marriage. I wish I am under a duty to remind people of the popular saying ‘problem shared is problem solved’, we therefore need one another to grow and develop. Whenever there is any work to be done it is advisable that people from other families should come out to assist. We should also instill the culture in children, so that they will know from childhood that helping or assisting others is a culture and it brings blessings.
Child training should be seen as a collective task and this is best practiced in extended family system. That culture known and practiced by our forefathers whereby any adult could scold any child found doing something wrong should not be allowed to die. If a child misbehaves, people should not see it as the duty of his parents to correct him. Parents and guardians should also not get angry when their children and wards are disciplined by others.
It is unfortunate that things are changing and the culture of helping one another is eroding gradually – thanks not to the economic hardship all over the world. People can no longer bear the burden of other people. Everything is monetized and no one is ready to help without charging for it. The purpose of training a child is for him to also train others when he is of age and settles down, but this is no longer possible because of enormous responsibilities.
It is imperative to call for understanding in this contemporary world that helping extended families is no longer feasible. Yes, it is important for people to realize and stop putting pressure on the people who are, especially in the towns and cities across the globe. Due to such high expectations and pressures from members of extended families, many people become dejected and sometime think of committing suicide. The case of Olisa Nwakoby, a Bank Manager who committed suicide by shooting himself on the head on Friday, 29th July, 2016 and was reported in this medium is a good example here. The latest finding is that the man committed suicide out of frustration, probably as a result of pressures from relatives.
Aminat Adesope is one of our Staff Writers.
Comments
Post a Comment