VIEW ON SECOND DIVORCE
In my last article published in this medium, I presented the significance of marriage in Islam and the provisions for divorce. Divorce is not expected to take effect merely by pronouncing ‘Dahi Talaaq’ meaning “I divorce you" in the presence of the wife by the husband to the wife. Remember I mentioned in that article that Allah recognizes the sanctity of marriage and it is expected that both parties in the union must uphold the values that guide the marriage. It is the will of Allah that both husband and wife should do everything to make their marriage work.
In order to avoid hasty dissolution of marriage there is provision for the second divorce. This happens after the reconciliation of the issue or issues that made the husband to tell the wife that he had divorced her. Where the reconciliation breaks down and all the efforts to make the husband take back the wife after pronouncing the first divorce, then the man will exercise his liberty to pronunce the second divorce. When this second divorce is pronounced to the hearing of the woman, it means that the woman will again have to go through a period of waiting known as ‘iddah’. During this period of waiting, the husband may return to his wife, that is to say, he may take her back as wife. And if the period of iddah is over, then he can re-marry her with her consent.
The divorce in which the husband has the right to return to his wife or take her back as wife or to revoke his divorce are the first and second divorces, that is the divorces given on two occasions. In the holy Quran it is ordained:“Divorce is to be given two times, and then (a woman) must be retained in good manner or released grace fully.” (Surah Baqarah-229)
VIEW ON THIRD DIVORCE
If after giving the second divorce, there is reconciliation resulting in the man taking back the wife, but soon after something unwarranted happens and efforts to resolve the matter fail then this time around the man is expected to marshal his thought before taking a decision, because there is no remedy after the third divorce is pronounced. Where this third divorce is allowed, it means any of the spouses may re-marry to any other person after the passing of the period of waiting, and the man should not consider the woman to be his lawful wife again. In this case the wife can only remarry the first husband again after she remarried and the marriage suffered the same fate as the first marriage leading to divorce by the second husband.
The holy Quran directs: “So if a husband divorces his wife (after two times) he cannot after that remarry her until after she has married another husband (and he has divorced her).” (Surah Baqarah-230)
The commands concerning this third divorce are very Strict, and it is called Talaq-i-mughallazah Bainah’. The third divorce is not only ‘baain’ (separator) (irrevocable) but it is so absolute that the man and the woman cannot remarry even with mutual agreement unless the woman is married to another man and this other man divorces her by his own free will, and not in accordance with a pre-planned understanding, or unless he dies. If this second husband divorces the woman perchance or he dies, and the woman wants to go back to her former husband, then she can remarry him. So, if the man wants to remarry a divorced spouse after the third time, he cannot just call her back and start sleeping with her. There are steps the Allah had commanded us to follow to marry a divorced woman.
First and foremost, the husband and the divorced woman must have got married to another person, that is, the husband must have married another wife and the woman must have married another husband and both couples must have had sexual intercourse with each other and the two parties must declare the marriage dissolved absolutely.
After the dissolution of the marriage, they are to start counting Iddah (counting period) as explained in the last write up. After the Iddah has expired, then they can now marry each other again.
The husband must go back to the woman’s house and seek for her parents' consent to remarry their daughter. He must do all necessary things all over again such as paying her bride price, providing witnesses and so on as if they are getting married for the first time.
Another thing we must note about divorce is that, only the woman is allowed to go immediately she is divorced. This is the woman that has just got married and her husband has not had sexual intercourse with her at all, probably because the woman is not pure or her husband heard a bad news about her, he may after all decide to divorce her.
It is important to let us know that it is only the husband that has the liberty to declare divorce, however the woman can walk out of the marriage in the exceptional cases such as when the man is impotent or the man constantly and consistently denies the woman the conjugal rights, maltreatment, desertion, and lack of care for her, just to mention few. The woman can also beg for divorce from the husband. Divorce declared by the woman is called “Khula”
Khula is the right of a woman in Islam to seek a divorce or separation from her husband. A Muslim woman may petition a Shariah court, or in non-Islamic areas an Islamic community panel, to grant her divorce if the husband refuses her decision. The waiting period (iddah) of a woman who seeks a divorce is one menstrual cycle or one month if she is post-menopausal, that is, ceased menstruating. This is to confirm that she is not pregnant. If the woman is pregnant, then the waiting period will last until she gives birth. Reasons for granting khula vary by region, but may include cruelty (darar) and impotence, or the husband not providing adequate food and shelter.
And in the concluding part of Surah Talaq, a warning of severe punishment is given to those who would disobey the Divine commands. In spite of these warnings, today the state of affairs among the Muslims is such that a very large number of them contravenes the Shariah commands and one section of Muslims even openly ridicules the Shariah Laws, and is bent upon terminating their injunctions, although a Muslim has given a pledge to his Lord that he would lead his life according to the way shown by Him and would keep the banner of His religion and His Shairah high. Then, why this disrespect to the Shariah laws by the Muslims!
Aminat Adesope is one of our Staff Writers.
Concluded
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